Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Bell Curve

In life we're given all kinds of statistics on the likelihood of good and/or bad things happening and with each variable change the percentages change accordingly.  I don't remember much from my stats class or what the percentages each standard deviation from the middle indicated but I know, for whatever, reason we've been on the wrong end.  There's a reason they tell you there is "a one percent chance" or "less than a 1 percent chance" that this or that will happen based on a given situation, but they don't say "there is a "zero" percent chance.  That reason being, for some unfortunate souls, things do happen on that end of the bell curve that balance everything out.
It started with our pregnancy, no doctor seemed to be able to figure out why we couldn't get pregnant.  But after surgeries, fertility drugs and artificial inseminations without success we had to turn to IVF.  We were fortunate, it worked and we were blessed with both transferred embryos taking hold.  Rachel's physician told her she was an "A+ pregnancy" that this was going to be a walk in the park because she was the perfect candidate.  She had already carried a baby to term and was young and healthy so the likelihood of anything going wrong was far away on distant point of some statistical bell curve that we wouldn't have to worry about because odds were so minuscule that it would be relevant to our case.
Then on September 5th Rachel's water broke unexpectedly in the Kroger checkout line like something out of a Lifetime movie.  Two days later at 2:09 and 2:12 AM Rachel gave birth to Adelaide and Wyatt.  Adelaide lived just 3 days and tore my heart in to pieces as I listened to her little heart beat just once in her chest and held my baby girl just one time before she had to be buried.  Wyatt has been a fighter and has lived and is living today, but today was is another day that our family found out we're filling the wrong side of the bell curve once again.
After the first week of life the likelihood of a brain bleed in an infant drops off, after the second week the percentages drop even more as we were told >95% of all head bleeds occur by week two. Here we sit at 21 days of life and we've just found out that Wyatt has a grade III and grade IV bleed.  Now we're left with decisions, the doctors tell us that most likely Wyatt, if he survives, will have some sort of cognitive and/or physical deficits that well significantly affect his quality of life.  The plan, for now, is to observe the bleeds and make sure they don't get any bigger, if they do they're really may not be a choice to make.  At this juncture we're torn, we hear "most likely" just as we've heard so many times already only to find out that we function in the most "unlikely".  Are we to believe that Wyatt will have deficits if he survives because it's "most likely" or are we to believe that he's going to give those statistical projections the finger just like he's given all of them so far? We ask for your prayers for the physicians, the nurses, Wyatt and us as we try to determine what's best for him and our family.


  1. Praying for all of you! Blessings-Tina Bruner

  2. Just wanted to let you both know that Chad and I are praying hard for Wyatt and his recovery and COMPLETE healing! Let us know if there is anything at all we can do for you guys. -Sarah

  3. Praying for you guys! I will be praying for healing and wisdom for the doctors and you all. I do believe that the Great Physician can heal Wyatt.